Post by Joanna on Mar 1, 2018 4:26:41 GMT -5
Zodiac Signs: Most Annoying Traits
Many articles have been written to help people understand the positive qualities of their zodiac signs. But where there are positive qualities, there are also negative qualities. And it’s about time we examined the parts of every zodiac sign we’ve grown to hate. I would suggest reading the following only if you’re in the mood to make fun of yourself because it’s not very nice. It’s not meant to be nice and if you have a problem with the truth, then you’re probably a whiny-ass Cancer.
Aries (March 21 - April 19): impulsive, rabid brutes. People born under Aries charge headlong into whatever they want without looking both ways and they sure as hell do it without concern for the consequences of their actions. They’re selfish, immature, unconscious and rabid in their pursuit of what they want. Actually, it sounds kind of sexy, doesn’t it? Well, it is until you see them eat a hamburger. Infamous Aries: Herb Baumeister, Carol Ann Boone, Judy Buenoano, John Reginald Christie, Dr. Christopher Duntsch, Robert Durst, Eric Harris, Donald Harvey, Shayna Hubers, Paul John Knowles, Rosie O’Donnell, Stephen Paddock, Colin Pitchfork, Gerard Schaefer and Jane Toppan.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20: hoarders. Tauri* are slow, stubborn, lazy materialists. They’re greedy as hell and they’d be happy sitting alone counting their money, surrounded by all their useless toys like a grubby-handed toddler. Intellectual, abstract, spiritual matters are beyond them because they care only about what they can get their hands on, but that won’t stop them from preaching to everyone else about how to live. They’re basically know-it-all idiots. Infamous Tauri: Robert Black, David Carpenter, Carroll Cole, Albert Fish, Elmer Wayne Henley, Adolf Hitler, H. H. Holmes, Waneta Hoyt, Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini, Adam Lanza, Vladimir Lenin, Bernie Madoff, Pol Pot and Steven Gerald James Wright.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20): shallow windbags. Geminis seem like they have a lot to add to a conversation until you realize they have – at best – a superficial knowledge of what they talk about. They could seriously benefit from a little lesson in word economy, but that would blow their cover as some sort of scholarly genius. They’re full of nothing but hot air and useless opinions, jumping from one subject to another, regurgitating information they’ve heard before in order to appear interesting. In actuality, though, they’re mediocre, shallow people without a unique perspective or depth. Infamous Geminis: Cristhian Bahena-Rivera, Mary Bell, Kenneth Bianchi, Thomas Neill Cream, Jeffrey Dahmer, Archibald Hall, Anthony Hardy, Trevor Joseph Hardy, Audrey Marie Hilley, John Hinkley Jr., James Holmes, Peter Kürten, Steven Pfiel, Danny Rolling, Arthur Shawcross, Joel Steinberg, Peter Sutcliffe, Wayne Williams and Robert Lee Yates.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22): li’l whiners. The hyper-sensitivity of those born under Cancer makes it impossible for others to really tell them how they feel because they’re afraid of hurting their insanely delicate wittle feewings. They are the biggest crybabies in the entire zodiac and in serious need of some toughening up. But that’ll never happen because they’re usually too busy crying about what victims they are. If you’re still reading this through the tears welling up in your eyes, Cancer, then I’d also like to add that you tell way too many stories about your friends to people who don’t know them. Perfect strangers do not care what you and your pal Greg did when you were growing up in the marshlands of wherever. Live in the moment! Infamous Cancers: David Berkowitz, George W. Bush, Lori Vallow Daybell, Westley Allan Dodd, Kenneth Erskine, Leona Helmsley, Genene Jones, Robert John Maudsley, Carl Panzram, Donald Rumsfeld, Tommy Lynn Sells, David Mark Temple and Charles Whitman.
Leo (July 23 - August 22): pompous blowhards. Leos are probably too busy patting themselves on the back to read an article that isn’t exclusively about them because they’re so self-centered. They don’t even see the irony of how insecure they are beneath their constant need for praise. When they can’t get compliments from others, they start psychotically praising themselves like some sort of manic, used-up Hollywood actress from the 30s, yelling “Do you know who I am?!” They’re despotic, bossy tyrants, surrounding themselves with a bunch of people who offer them empty, shallow compliments. Infamous Leos: Idi Amin, Arthur Bremer, Liz Cheney, Chad Daybell, Amy Fisher, David Alan Gore, John George Haigh, Myra Hindley, Frederick R. “Fritz” Klenner, Bruce George Peter Lee, Meghan Markle, Raymond Leslie Morris, Donald Neilson, Rabbi Fred Neulander, Hedda Nussbaum, Della “Dante” Sutorius, Pamela Smart, Cary Stayner and Maxine Waters.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22): neurotic doormats. Virgos are uptight people who control every detail of their lives to death because they hate spontaneity or any upset to their petty day-to-day routine. Because of their neurotic inability to just let go and have fun, they make fantastic assistants or employees and horrific sexual partners. Furthermore, their obsession with cleanliness is genuinely frightening to watch, as anything being out-of-place makes them fear for their lives. Infamous Virgos: Rev. Matthew Baker, Terry Blair, Carol M. Bundy, Dean Carter, Cullen Davis, Albert DeSalvo, Ed Gein, John Getreu, Dylan Klebold, Lyndon B. Johnson, John List, Henry Lee Lucas, Anjette Lyles, Bonnie Parker, Mark Redwine, Gerald Stano, Marybeth Tinning and Graham Young.
Libra (September 23 - October 22): hypocritical people pleasers. Because of Libra’s desire to be accepted and liked and deep need to feel popular, they have no backbone and rarely are able to just make a decision. Going out to eat with them is impossible because they’ll look at the menu like they’re reading a Great American novel, never making up their minds and attempting to do field research on the waiter with all their questions, while you’re like, “Just pick something, dammit!” Eventually, they’ll choose whatever you do because doing anything alone is impossible for them. They’re phobic about exercising one shred of independence. Infamous Libras: Beverley Allitt, Lawrence Bittaker, Angelo Buono Jr., Tom Capano, Nikolas Cruz, Mack Ray Edwards, Kamala Harris, Patrick Kearney, Patrick Mackay, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Ilhan Omar, Lee Harvey Oswald, Dayton Leroy Rogers, Al Sharpton, Susan Smith, Dr. Michael Swango and Fred West.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21): petty perverts. Scorpios are known for their sexuality, however, that sexuality has less to do with sensual pleasure than a total lack of any ability to control their impulses. They enjoy watching people suffer because it makes them feel more like they are in a position of power when others show signs of weakness. They hide behind a mask of mystery and secrecy, attempting to hide the obvious fact they feel unloved, which drives them almost paranoid and leads them to treating their relationships like a series of political power plays. This eventually creates huge messes they never actually clean up. Infamous Scorpios: Joe Biden, Hillary Clinton, Mary Ann Cotton, Joseph DeAngelo, Nannie Doss, Lynndie England, Aiden Fucci, Kristen Gilbert, Amy Archer-Gilligan, Belle Gunness, Harold Henthorn, William Heirens, Katherine Knight, Omar Mateen, Leonard Lake, Derrick Todd Lee, Charles Manson, Betty Neumar, Michael Peterson, Scott Peterson and Dennis Parker Ray.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21): irritating attention-seekers. Don’t be fooled by the Sagittarius love for philosophy and spirituality or all their talk about it. In truth, they’re using these things to avoid the reality of everyday activities they’d rather not deal with and the fact they’re very empty people. The most frustrating thing about them is they will never truly understand how their lack of thorough investigation into anything makes them appear extremely dumb because they don’t care. It isn’t knowledge they’re after; it’s the appearance of knowledge. Infamous Sagittarii: Stacey Abrams, Ted Bundy, George Chapman, Governor Andrew Cuomo, Miley Cyrus, Lester “Baby Face Nelson” Gillis, Harvey Glatman, Dana Sue Gray, Steven Grieveson, Linda Burfield Hazzard, Gary M. Heidnik, Clifford Irving, Edmund Kemper, Dennis Andrew Nilsen, Richard Speck, Josef Stalin and Rosemary West.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19): social-climbing sharks. Capricorns are duller than ditch water, cold as corpses, unfeeling and uncaring. That is, unless you have money or are on a pathway to it. They’re the original social climbers and nobody can blame them because their own personalities aren’t interesting enough to climb the ladder of success on their own. It’s rare to find them having fun because that would be out of character for a sign that’s so busy calculating whom they should be rubbing shoulders with to get to the top and whom they should crush along the way. Infamous Capricorns: William “Bill” Bradford, Ian Brady, Al Capone, Dean Corll, Janie Lou Gibbs, Kim Jong-un, Sheila Jackson Lee, Israel Keyes, Michael Lupo, Susie Newsom Lynch, John Allen Muhammad, Charles Ng, Michelle Obama, John Edward Robinson, Dr. Sam Sheppard, Dr. Harold Shipman, George Joseph Smith, Mao Zedong and Randall Woodfield.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18): sheep in wolves’ clothing. While Aquarii may appear to be eccentric, weird or original, they’re markedly aware of the fact they aren’t that special. It’s simply their need to prove they are different that makes them so, not any inherent or genuine uniqueness. Aquarii claim to be generous and altruistic, caring for all humanity, but just ask their partners and they’ll tell you when it comes to one-on-one relationships, there’s no one as detached or uncaring as an Aquarius. They use their terminal uniqueness as an excuse for their lack of love and affection in personal relationships, but in the end, believing they are geniuses could lead them to a breakdown. Annoyingly, this would please them because they’ll do anything to appear interesting. Infamous Aquarii: Hunter Biden, William S. “Bill” Bradfield Jr., Jerry Brudos, Dick Cheney, Dean Clark, Stephen B. Crawford, Jeffrey Epstein, Robert Hansen, Rex Heuermann, Dr. John R. Hill, Dr. Martin MacNeill, Lee Boyd Malvo, Blanche Taylor Moore, Colin Norris, Roy Norris, Gary Ridgway, Joel Rifkin, William Tecumseh Sherman and Kevin Trudeau.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20): sentimental nobodies. Because Pisces are so willing to just go with the flow, they spend most of their lives having only a vague sense of self. Not really knowing who they are or what they want, they get caught up in sentimental hysteria and live in a constantly confused sort of chaos. It’s been said that not all who wander are lost, and if you’re a Pisces, you probably love this quote. It gives you some affirmation that you’re not completely lacking direction in your life, but you are, Pisces. You are lost. Infamous Pisces: Casey Anthony, Leslie Bailey, Carl “Charlie” Brandt, Joey Buttafuoco, Doug Clark, Charles Cullen, John Wayne Gacy, Colin Ireland, Todd Kohlhepp, Randy Steven Kraft, Osama bin Laden, Peter Manuel, Mark Martin, Dennis Rader, Richard Ramirez, Mitt Romney, John Straffen, Ottis Toole, Harvey Weinstein, Colonel Russell Williams and Aileen Wuornos.
Sources: Rosebud Baker, Elite Daily, January 5, 2017, Infamous Birthdays; and Birthdays of the Demonic and Damned.
*Note: Taurus, Sagittarius and Aquarius are Latin in origin, ergo, their plural forms are Tauri, Sagittarii and Aquarii.